Moments in My Life

Sad news.  Potty training is still not successful.  He has been on underwear when we are at home for over 2 months now.  But sometimes he still wet in his underwear.  The thing is, when we ask him to go potty, he always replies, “No! No! No!”  He never says, “Yes” when we ask him.  He tells us sometimes, but most of the time is just too late.  He wet a little in his underwear.  That I can deal with, no problem.  But not with what I am going to write up next.

His sleeping schedule is quite successful.  *touch wood*  He has been sleeping between 9pm to 9:30pm.  He will drink his 9.5oz milk at 8:30pm.  Then we read and he goes to sleep.  This schedule has been working since more than a month ago.  I will take him to potty around 11:30pm then he will sleep through the night dry.  There was once or twice accidents within the first three weeks where he wet the bed.  It was OK.  He has to learn. 

But unfortunately, thing changed.  Between the last two weeks, I had to change his bedsheet four times in the middle of the night.

Night 1 - change bedsheet, mattress pad and mattress

Night 2 - change bedsheet, mattress pad and mattress; add a 24″ x 15″ protector liner underneath the mattress pad

Night 3 - change bedsheet, mattress pad and mattress; add another 24″ x 15″ protector liner; this time he wet towards the end of the bed where there was no protector liner

Night 4 - changed bedsheet, mattress pad and protector liner; mattress was safe this time

Luckily we have an additional mattress from the top bunk bed that is unused. So we exchanged it back and forth. Since the first night incident, I had to take him to potty at 11:30pm as well as at 2:30am. This is not what I want to be doing, just like back when he needed the midnight feeding. So I’ve decided to let him be on diaper for the night time. It took me probably more than 6 times changing his bedsheets to realize that I need my sleep than letting him be wear a diaper just for the night time. I really don’t want to put him back on diaper but for now, I think I had to. He is on his diaper now sleeping inside his room.

Two Tuesday ago, we went to Victor Park with Brandon’s classmate from Parenting Class at Torrance Adult School. We arrvied at 10:15am. Actually we were late as I was trying to get Brandon to go to potty before we leave home and it took forever. It was a fine warm day. The park is rather new, probably put up less than a month ago. There are two playgrounds. One is a toddler size and another one which is higher probably for older children.

In the beginning Brandon run around the toddler’s playground. Then he followed his friend to the bigger one and I followed him. We went on the tunnel slide which he really likes. There is a sharp turn in the tunnel and that is the reason why I have to go down with him. He also started to learn how to climb the ladder type of stairs. He did fine until the last step. He was unsure where to put his feet. So I always follow him behind and hold on to his butt. I am very scare that he might miss a step and fall down.

That day wasn’t our first day at the park. Our first time there was on a Friday evening and the playground was really crowded. Brandon wasn’t up to it and we only stayed like 15 minutes or less. This time around, we stayed for 45 minutes before we left to eat lunch at Pat & Oscars. It was the first time I had a meal outside with him alone. We had a good time by ourselves. We even packed the leftover for our dinner that day.

Toddlers playground.

Toddlers playground.

The bigger playground for older kids.

The swings.

More swings.

The tunnel slide which Brandon likes.

Mommy and little boy at Victor Park.

You want to know what we learned in the first three days of Mommy and Me Swimming Lesson?

Day 1
Warm up song (Wheel on the Bus tune)

The children in the pool go up and down,
up and down, up and down
The children in the pool go up and down
All day long

Repeat the red phrase with “side to side“, “back and forth” and “round and round“.

Kicking in the water (skill of the day)

Motorboat motorboat goes so slow
Motorboat motorboat goes so fast
Motorboat motorboat step on the gas

Day 2
Warm up song (see above)

Blow bubble (skill of the day)

Day 3
Warm up song (see Day 1)

Paddling with both arms (skill of the day)

Row row row your boat
Gently down the stream
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily
Life is but a dream

I have no hair stylist certificate from international beauty school but I am a barber at home for my little 2 years old boy. I won’t say I am really professional but the cut I give him is decent enough that I can bring him out the same day after the hair cut. I do hope the more I do his hair cut, the better I will get.

But it will not be as good as those professional hair stylists definitely. Hey, after all they do get their Cosmetology certificates from a beauty school like International Beauty School at James College Mason City, Iowa. I wish I can attend the school but it is too far for me. Besides Cosmetology, they also offer Massage Therapy Training. For that, I can send my husband to learn. What I didn’t know is a certified and licensed Massage Therapist will have to complete at least 650 hours course then undertake the National Massage Therapy Examination. If you think you want to become a massage therapist or a cosmetologist, remember to check out the International Beauty School at James College. The application form is available online. They even will help you find housing if needed.

This Monday was our first Mommy and me swimming class at Victor E Benstead Plunge in Torrace. I had signed up last week online for a two weeks term of Mommy and Me class offered by the city of Torrance at the public swimming pool. The class will be held daily for two weeks, from 8/18 to 8/29. Each class is only 25 minutes long, from 11:15am to 11:40am. The pool is an Olympic size pool that has been divided into three sections and it holds three different classes at the same time.

Yesterday was our first class. Brandon didn’t like the water much initially. We sat by the pool to prepare to go in, but he wanted to leave already. And once inside the pool, he crabbed me so tightly and didn’t want to let go. The 4 young school age instructors are friendly but we didn’t receive any personal attention from them. It was fine with me as it may terrify Brandon if they come too near anyway. We were told that each day will be a new skill learned. Kicking in the water was our skill for that day.

Brandon began to enjoy the class when he knows how to kick. It was not that bad, but the moment we were into the class, the lifeguard gave us a horn to let us know is time to get off the pool. WOW … that’s a short 25 minutes I thought. Everyone was out of the pool and moving into the Women’s changing area. There are only 3 bathrooms. I didn’t bother to bath, just change and we left. I gave him a bath only when we got home.

We will be there again today at 11am. We’ll see what new skill we will learn this morning.

Backdated post

Brandon took his nap around 2pm this afternoon.  It was a little easier but still I needed to give him several warnings about closing the door.  That helped.  After he napped, I quickly vacuumed the floor and mopped it.  I saw ants coming out from the wall scavenging around for food/water.  But they are not at somewhere … one here and one there, no trails.  It was annoying.  That’s why I cleaned up the floor. 

It was around 2:35pm when I was done.   I washed my hands with soap and then pull the furniture back to where they supposed to be.  And then I was about to look for food to eat and the boy woke up.  I thought he might go back to sleep after I brought him to potty but no.  He cried and wanted me to be with him but I on the other hand was looking for food to eat as I was hungry by then.  I didn’t care, I let him cried and ate a breadstick with some potato wedges from our lunch.  I had a small salad earlier around 11:30am when we were out this morning.  I wasn’t able to eat much because of the little boss. 

I am tired … I didn’t have much of a break.  I had wanted to watch some tvb series while eating but that was not possible at all.  Now he is watching tv and I am typing this.

Remember in the middle of last week I wrote out the 9:30pm bedtime?  I was following a schedule for the whole week.  We have to sacrifice and have our dinner at 5pm.  By the time my son finishes his, it will be around 5:30pm.  Sometimes I started feeding his dinner before 5pm.  That means I started cooking around 4:20pm.  People in KL are just starting to have tea time and we here are having dinner.  But it all works out great!

1. Feed dinner at 5pm.
2. Some type of activity 6-7pm. (visit MIL’s house, walking around the block, park)
3. Bath time 7-730pm.
4. Mommy own time 7:30pm-8pm. 
5. Daddy play time with Brandon 7:30-8:15pm.
6. Mommy bath time 8pm.
7. Warming milk 8:15pm.
8. Milk time 8:30pm.
9. Mommy reading time 8:35-8:45pm.
10. Getting ready to sleep 8:45-9pm.

This schedule works for me now.  I will stick to this one.  So no going out later than 7pm for us anymore.  We have to be home by 7:15pm the latest. 

So now he sleeps early, it also means he wakes up early in the morning.  At 7am he will be up.  Before, he would sleep till raound 8-9pm.  I will have some morning time to myself.  Now I have the night time to myself for about 2 hours.  Same same. 

Almost forgot to note, by end of the week, I ended up sleeping (teman) with him in his room.  So no more running otut the room, screaming or crying session.  Being inside the room helps much more than the initial plan of staying outside the room.  He slept faster, no more crying and for me, it saved my energy meter.  Both happy.

Brandon, he prefers to hard way than soft talk.  Sometimes I have to scold him until he cries then he would at least listen or go to sleep.  I tried being nice and friendly talking to him and he thinks is all play.  He likes to step on my tail and test my patience every single day.  I don’t have much of that left by now. 

For example - Going to sleep/nap.

Mommy says,

You are tired, then you go sleep.  Why do you want to fight to sleep when you are already tired.  You know the ritual.  After your afternoon milk, you go to nap.  After your night milk, you go to sleep.  But even you are very tired, you won’t want to budge.  

It is very simple.  All you need to do is just close your eyes gently and you will go to sleep.  But not.  You want me to scold you because you kept running out from the room thinking I am playing with you when I am nice.  You want me to scold you because I told you nicely to sleep on the bed and stay there, you don’t listen.  You want me to close the door, even I gave you plenty of warnings and try my best not to close the door but you force me to.  You want to cry and scream when there is no reason to.  You hurt your own lungs if you scream like that.  I tell you but you don’t understand.  The chalazion on right eye will not heal, if you keep on crying everyday like that.  All because you want to fight not to nap/sleep.

Yesterday evening I tried my toddler night time schedule again. I gave him a bath around 7:30pm and I remembered to remind him that we were getting ready for bedtime which would be soon. I took my shower a little later at 8:15pm. Finished up around 8:30pm and he was done with his milk. I went to his bedroom and again, reminded him that it would be bedtime pretty soon. We read two books and played a little bit with his stuff animal and by 8:50pm, I was ready for him to sleep.

Constantly, I assured him that I would be just outside the door and would come in if needed. Kissed him good nite and cuddled and I walked out the door. Pulled up the pink Ikea Mammut stool and sat down reading my Reader Digest just right outside the door. The light on the hallway was on. I only started reading the first line, I saw someone standing besides me. By looking at him, I know he still wanted to play. But I reminded him again it was bedtime and he had to be on his bed. I carried him to bid good nite to Daddy and down the bed he went. I gave him another cuddle and more kisses. This repeated for about 5 times. Towards the 4th and 5th time, I didn’t give him any eye contact or cuddling.

The next thing I gave him was a warning that I would close the door if he ever leave the bed again. And he did it. And close the door I did. He cried a little … I was all the time outside the door requesting for him to go on his bed and I would open the door but he would just stand behind the door crying. It was about 9pm then. He asked for Oh Shee (potty) about 3 minutes into the crying. I opened up the door and brought him sitting on the potty. He didn’t go. I put the pants on and wiped his wet face. He walked himself to his bed and laid down. I gave him kisses and cuddle and assured him I would be just outside the bedroom if he needed me. I walked out. He didn’t leave the bed. I was sitting and reading … and I heard no noise. I went about to do my chores.

About 9:20pm I thought he should have gone to sleep by then, so I went inside his room quietly to pick up some laundry to fold. He heard me and turned over. Our eyes met. I told him I needed to fold his cloths, took the unfolded laundry and walked outside. In about 1 minutes, I heard his anklet bells ringing louder and louder. He came to my bedroom. I left what I was doing and went to him. Eye contact with him telling him that is bedtime. I took him to potty and he did go. He went back to his bed on his own. I gave him cuddles and kisses again and left the room. It was about 9:30pm. He slept.

Before, my son’s afternoon nap was from 3pm onwards (could be 3:30 or 4) till around 5 or 6pm.  Now I am trying to get him sleeping earlier at night, I have to move his nap time earlier too.  He has been napping around 1-2pm.  It is better if we have an active morning and that will tired him out.  But sometimes even how tired he is, he still want to fight to nap.

I am also trying to get him taking his nap independently.  It works out fine today after a lot of eye to eye serious conversation as well as a door closing session for 2 minutes.  Initially, he wanted me to sit next to him. I did it for a little bit but he was not much into sleeping so I walked out. Then again he pulled me back inside. Then again requested for me to sit next to him. I could but I didn’t want it to build up as a habit. So I told him NO! Firmly! Then I walked out. He came running out to the dining room (where I work) to play but I again told him is nap time with very close eye to eye contact. It happened 3 times. I repeated the same thing for 3 times. After the last time, we walked back to the bedroom together.

Not too long after that, he left his bed again. I gave him another warning - if he leaves the bed again, I would close the door. I had to close the door for that short 2 minutes. He was asking for potty immediately the door was closed. He knows what to get me to him. I went inside and took him to potty, he did go. Then I took him to the bed and ask him to pretend the ducky is me and the moo is Daddy. I asked him to hug the duck to sleep and pretend that it was me cuddling him. Before I left his bedside, I told him I will be busy making dinner so don’t get up from the bed again. I walked out.

Five minutes gone by, it was very quiet and I knew he fell asleep already. I peeked inside and saw him in the same sleeping position as the moment I left his bedside.