Moments in My Life

I am trying to switch Brandon’s bedtime to an earlier time.  Prior to tonight, his bedtime was usually after 10pm and can be as late as 11 or 11:30pm on certain nights.  Then I read an online website that toddler under 4 should sleep around 8pm. 

It will be a challenge for me to put him to bed at 8pm, so my goal for this month is to have him asleep by 9-9:30pm.  Of course ideally at 9pm.  We’ll see how it goes by end of this month.

The schedule (with some notes) I am trying to follow:

1. Feed him dinner around 5:30pm.  Should be done by 6pm.
2. Give him bath around 7-7:30pm. 
3. Daddy reading time 7:30-8pm. (Tell him is going to be bedtime soon)
4. I will try to have my shower around 7:45pm.
5. Mommy reading time 8-8:30pm. (Tell him bedtime is around the corner)
6. Warm milk around 8:15pm. (Remind him bedtime is coming up)
7. Let him drink milk around 8:30pm.  (After his milk, remind him again about bedtime)
8. Take him potty if he needs.
9. Read the night night book, turn off the light.  The auto night light will come on.
10. Let him know bedtime is here and that we love him, and is time to go sleep so tomorrow will have plenty of energy to play.
11. Kiss and goodnite hugs.  Daddy come in to say goodnite.
12. Assure him that I will be just outside his room and available if he needs me.
13. Give him another hug and kiss.  (Bring his teddy bear, moo and ducky to sleep next to him)
14. Leave his  room.
15. Sit just outside his room with the door open.

There are some notes I put next to it so I remember to do it.  Yesterday was the start of the schedule.  He slept at 10pm last night.  Tonite, he slept at 9:45pm. 

It wasn’t easy.  There were many crying sessions that I endured while sitting outside his room.  Yesterday and today, I had to take him back inside his room numerous times … countless times.  He kept running out from the bed to the door, standing there and asking me to go inside to sleep with him.  But I couldn’t give in. 

First few times, I tried to explain to him that is bedtime and he needs to be sleeping by himself now.  Next many times, I just brought him to bed and left him without saying anything.  He came up from the bed again.  And I repeated the same thing.  Then whenever I carried him to his bed, he held on to me very tightly and didn’t want to let me go.  He kept repeating that he’s sorry.  But I wasn’t suppose to say anything.  As instantly as it was, after I left him on his bed, he would come out again. 

If I were to follow the Super Nanny’s method, it will not work.  It suggests for parent to bring the kids in on the third time onwards without any eye contact or soft words.  But this didn’t work for us.  Brandon needs to hear those soft words that I am there, that I still loves him, everytime. 

So after dunno how many times of bring him inside to his bed, I gave him warning - that if he comes out again, I would close the door.  And close the door I had to after he did it for a third time.  And the crying sessions started.  He would be standing next to the door and crying and kept repeating he’s sorry.  I told him to go back to his bed and lay his head on the pillow and I would open the door.  He did that only after 5-10 mins of crying. 

I opened the door.  And immediately he sat up from his bed and came running out again.  I carried him inside and told him that I am not going anywhere, and that I am just sitting outside so I can read under the light.  He held me more tightly than before and wanted me to sit besides him.  After a few times of constantly taking him back inside the room, I suddenly remember … then I told him again that I love him and that I am just going to be outside the room.  One extra thing I did was … I brought his ducky, moo and teddy bear from above his pillow to be sleeping besides him on his pillow.  I gave him more hugs and kisses and assured him that I am not going anywhere but just outside to read. 

After that, he didn’t leave the bed and was cuddling the duck and 5 minutes later, I hear quietness.  He slept.  It was 9:45pm. 

This was my second night of endurance towards putting him to sleep at an earlier time by himself.